THREE POUNDS TILL "ONEDERLAND"

So excited...I'm starting to go down finally! I am now at 202....yes....just three pounds till I get into "onederland"! I suppose counting calories works...imagine that, what a concept! I am taking a meal to a family tonight and making brownies, so of course I feel like I should make them for my own family too, however I am very nervous that I will end up eating some myself. Everything in moderation...right??? Be listening for the day I hit 199...I guarantee you will all hear the scream where ever you are!

Working on Cutting the Calories Back

Well, it's been a week since I saw the nutritionist and I have finally gotten back to within one pound of where I was in May at my lowest weight. I am still struggeling to stay under 1,200 calories a day......I almost always hit 1,300 or a little over. Obviously some days are better than others. Hard for me to get the protein in and stay under 1,300. Last Friday was a bad day for me, in fact I didn't even try to count the calories.....couldn't count that high! Keith and I took some time away for the day to celebrate our 29th anniversary (which was in June), and we went to New Albany, Indiana and ate lunch at the Paula Deen restaurant there......a buffet with sooo much food, including desserts! Loads of butter.....and boy was it awesome! With every bite I took I said "Oh my God", and Keith laughed so hard at me. They had a coconut cake, and of course I "had" to try it out.....Oh my God!!!! Within a half hour after finishing lunch I started foaming at the mouth and had to make a mad dash for the bathroom. Luckily though, I never threw up, but I stayed in the bathroom for a half hour just to be on the safe side. Was it worth it???? Well, yes, just once for the experience, but to do it again???? No, I don't think so!

Then we went back to Louisville to St. Matthew's Mall and I tried on about 20 dresses for an upcoming wedding in August; and no, I didn't buy one yet, but I will say this....I LOVE to shop now!!! THEN.......we went to The Cheesecake Factory for dinner and split a philly steak sandwich, and yes, we got cheesecake! We did bring it home for later though, and yes, I did get sick on it again. It was awesome going down though! However, I think next time I "have to have" Cheesecake Factory, I'll stick with plain low carb w/ fruit on it though.....I won't be having the macadamia nut or the Reeses! Oh well, sometimes you just gotta splurge and for sure I did!!!

Met With the Nutritionist Yesterday

Yesterday was my meeting with the nutritionist and I found it to be very helpful and enlightening. She had asked me to journal my food and I discovered I was having on average about 1,600 calories a day. She told me that is fine, and it's really good because it shows that 1,600 calories is my maintenance calories, which will help in the end when I get to maintenance. In the meantime however, I need to cut my caloric intake down to around 1,200. It's probably going to take me a few days to get that down. She also "buzzed" me on weighing too often. I weigh every night, in the middle of the night when I get up to go to the bathroom, and every morning......yes, that's right....3 times a day! I told her that at first I didn't think I was obsessed over it, however I have come to the realization that apparently I am obssessed with it.

So, my goals for the next four weeks are to 1) Cut my calories down to 1,200 a day; 2) Weigh only once a day; 3) Walk at least 40 minutes a day; and 4) No "mindless" eating. In four weeks I will go visit her again and hopefuly have started my loss back again.....goal is to lose 1 lb a week. Still learning so much about myself!!!

July 8th, 2011 Got My Game Going On

Yes, I got my game going on, but that's not necessarily a good thing....cause it's in my head! I discovered yesterday that I can visit the nutrionist at the doctor's office for free, so I decided to call her and get an appointment. When I called she asked that I keep a log of my food till my visit with her, next Wednesday. So....in writing down my intake from yesterday this morning I realized that I am clearly sabbotaging myself with those little BLT's.....bites, licks and tastes (a term from my Weight Watcher days). Okay, so did you realize that one of those big jaw breakers from Cracker Barrel has about 100 calories in it????? I never dreamed it would have that many! Seven Cheetos is approximately 80 calories....yea, great question "why am I having cheetos and jawbreakers to start with", right???? I've also been very laxed about eating popcorn, chips, etc....you get the picture....."how much can a little bit hurt?". Brings me back to what I have been saying all along, they fixed my stomach, but not my head! Which leads me to my next point.....so I have been sabotaging myself......what next??? Forget the past and move forward I say! With my stomach being able to hold so much more, it is very difficult to keep myself in check, but if I am honest with myself I do tend to eat out of boredom....a very difficult habit to break. I will post next week after meeting with the nutritionist and keep everyone posted. I am trying to update more now, but I am finally realizing that I haven't been keeping myself in check like I should have been, which is most likely the cause of my LONG plateau!!!

July 4th, 2011 - Darn Sugar!!!

Happy July 4th everyone!!! I LOVE this holiday! I have learned so much about myself this weekend in celebrating. I had bought a colossal cookie to take to the July 4th celebration at Lynn and Larry's Saturday....that stupid cookie has haunted me all weekend!!! There was very little of it taken at the get together, so I had to bring it home......that thing haunted me till I got home at 11:30 that night and HAD to eat some...then I was sick for over an hour till I finally fell off to sleep! I have decided that I am NOT safe with even a "little bit" of sugar! I just cannot handle having a little bit....one little bit becomes the desire for two little bits, two little bits becomes the desire for three little bits.....well, you get the picture! Anyway....I have discovered this weekend that I am just going to have to go back to the basics and completely avoid sugar altogether!!! I have discovered that if I have sugar in small doses I don't get sick....unfortunately as I proved to myself this weekend....I can't handle small doses...even with getting sick...it just doesn't stop me!!! I had a discussion with myself yesterday and came to the realization that I needed to decide if I was going to accept what I had permanently done by having this surgery and allow it to do for me what I went into it expecting it to do.......OR.....if I was going to buck the system I have created in my stomach and let it fail in the end!!! WOAHHH!!!! Thus the HEAD GAME!!!! Clearly as I have said many times before, they didn't fix my head, they fixed my stomach. Anyway I have decided that perhaps the reason for my LONG stall might be that I have been sabotaging myself! Okay, so as of yesterday I decided to go back to the basic of cutting out the sugar completely, and the original basics of this program of ingesting nothing that has more than 3 grams of sugar in it...Let's see what happens!

July 2010 and July 2011 --- PROGRESS!!!