Why Does Have to Take Something Scary to Put Me Back On Track????

This week I have lost 7 lbs.  After the scare on Sunday night with my bowel, I have been towing the line, and have gotten back to the basics of the way I am supposed to eat with my surgery.  No sugar, no soft-drinks, very few carbs, and chew,chew, chewing that food good before swallowing.  I have still had some stomach discomfort, so I am not sure I am totally out of the woods yet, but I am definitely towing the line and making sure that I don't eat anything that will aggravate it. 

The question I have asked myself this week is, "why did it take something scary to happen to put me back on track".  I mean really....I have a new stomach and that stomach really deserves respect for what it is, and I have to admit that I have been very careless for several months now, and clearly it caught up with me.  Therefore, now I am working desperately to get back on track and in the groove of things the way I was in the beginning.  It's easy to forget when things are going well, and I know for myself, I often forget that the reason things were going well is because I was following the rules....when I let up on following the rules so rigidly, I found myself getting into trouble.

Next week I will be in Pigeon Forge with my family, let's see if I can stick so rigidly while on vacation...wouldn't it be awesome to come back from vacation and have a weight loss???  The good thing is that after this week, I have new found hope that I may actually reach my goal!

Possible Bowel Obstruction????

Going to the doctor today. Sunday night before I ever got to sleep I started having excruciating pain, my stomach extended til I looked like I was six months pregnant, I had a knot on the right side of my lower abdomen, my stomach was as hard as a rock, and I litterally felt like I was going to burst.  So yesterday I ate an egg on an english muffin from McDonalds, was feeling better.  Later I ate a ham sandwich and a protein bar and started having a little bit of pain in my right side again. I decided I probably needed to call the doctor, so when the nurse called me back she scheduled me for an appointment today, and told if that EVER happened to me again to go straight to the ER. In looking up all of the symptoms and information, it appears I have a partial bowel obstruction. I am terrified they will want to admit me to the hospital, but as long as they can get by without doing surgery I guess I can handle that.  Will keep everyone posted!

 Good news.....no bowel obstruction...I had a CT Scan and it was fine!!! Praise the Lord, thank you Jesus!!!

Struggling!!!

I have moved the scale below 200, but I am really struggling to get it back down.  One of my biggest fears has always been that I will gain my weight back, and right now I am really struggling to not panic about it.  I don't know, maybe I should panic?????  I am journaling again, which is really very important with success in weight loss I have discovered.  I tend to think "oh I didn't eat much today", but then when I go back and reflect on the day, I realize "OH WOW!!!".  Journaling helps me to keep it under control and to stay focused.  I am trying so hard not to fall back into my old habits, but it's really difficult.  Sometimes I worry that I have lost my original focus and reason for having my surgery......to be healthy!

Putting it on the Table.....In Spite of the Embarrassment!!

Okay, so yesterday morning I was mortified when I woke up and weighed, and the scale said 200!!!  I thought "I am not going to tell anyone about this, I refuse to admit it to anyone".  Then as I was thinking about it this morning I realized.....the purpose of my blog is to hold myself accountable.  If I am going to put myself out there, then I need to be totally honest.  Yesterday my sister was talking to someone, and she told them that she felt very fortunate that at the age of 66 she is in better health than either of our three older sister's were at 66.  I realized....hey....that's why I did this surgery to begin with!  Sometimes I am sure I have lost total focus of my whole purpose in the first place.  My addiction with food is definitely still very much alive and I must get it under control NOW!!!  In reviewing my eating habits over the past couple of months, I tried to reflect on what could possibly be the factor/s here that is causing the issue. It's fairly simple....I have been eating peanut butter daily, not good; I have been drinking too many soft drinks, not good; I have been eating too many sweets, not good; and I've been just plain snacking too much, not good!!!  I can turn this around before it gets out of hand, but I have to do it NOW....I can't wait. I must wake up and get this problem under control!

What is My Problem?????

  I seem to just eat and eat and eat.......it's like food is all I have been thinking about lately!  I have such a fear of coming this far and gaining all the weight back, and yet I still continue to eat too much!  It's just like always.....proving the head game goes on and on.  I am still way too close to 200 lbs, to let myself rest at all, it wouldn't take much for me to top over that mark, and yet I would be so angry with myself if I did do that!  Today I decided that I would try having a protein shake for breakfast for a few days, and attempt to watch my calories closer and see if I can start the scale moving downward.  I need to be more vigilant....get thee behind me Satan!!!

August 3, 2012

Had my appointment with my primary care doctor today, and he was thrilled with my blood pressure, my breathing and my weight.  I had lost another 3 lbs since I had seen him in February, and he was very pleased with that.  He told me that he doesn't care if I lose another pound, as long as I don't gain now. 

This week has been a decent week, I have manged to maintain my weight this week. I have been working in the yard, and yard work is actually very good exercise.  This morning I was listening to Joyce Meyer and she was talking about how we allow things to control us, and how if we say we live in the Holy Spirit, we don't have to be controlled by habits. Example for myself: "Those cookies are calling my name".  Well, she said I don't have to be controlled by those cookies, if I live in the spirit I should be able to ignore the cookies and call on the Holy Spirit to help me.  It sounds like a very simple process, and I agree with her, but why isn't it as as simple as it sounds?  While listening to her message I started to reflect on my thoughts about chocolate, ice cream and just sweets in general, I realized that if I could remember to call on the Spirit every time I get tempted I should be able to lose the last 20 lbs. I want to lose.  Therefore, my challenge and/or goal for myself over the next week is to try to concentrate instead of "subconsciensly" eating, and try to focus more on calling on the Holy Spirit to help me draw the line,and see if I can make any headway in my attempt to lose the last 20 pounds.

July 25, 2012 - Surviving Vacation

I was on vacation last week, and unfortunately stayed home.  I found two things out about myself: 1) I am not ready to retire and stay home and 2) My head definitely still thinks if I am sitting around I must eat.  This was a "rest" vacation and we only did a couple of things, but for the most part stayed home.  I found that when I was sitting at the house resting all I wanted to do was eat.  People think that because you can't eat much after gastric by-pass that you don't eat a lot.  The problem is you can only eat a small amout at one time, however you can still graze and overeat.....thus, sitting around the house makes it easy to graze.  I found myself grazing a lot.  I am trying to get back into the swing of things this week, walking and trying to watch my caloric intake.

I also found that I didn't take my vitamins and medications on regular schedule either.  I usually take my vitamins and meds after I eat my breakfast at work every morning about 8:00 like clock work.  However, while at home sometimes I didn't eat till the afternoon and by that time I forgot to take my meds.....just being off schedule can make a huge difference.  I didn't feel as energetic either, just sitting around and not getting my vitamins.....two years later, they are still important.

I did go to the Q Store in Somerset one day and got three pairs of pants for $6 each and a sweater for $4. I LOVE finding good buys like that!  They are much easier to find in my new size than when I was large. Of course when you need clothes and you can find bargains like that, it makes you feel really good.  One thing I was concerned about was having to buy new clothes and not being able to afford them, but I have been extremely fortunate to find lots of things off the clearance racks.  You sure don't find those kinds of clearance's on the "big girl" racks.

Hard to believe it, but Pauline passed away three weeks ago tomorrow on June 21st.  I had the most awesome pleasure of being there with her as she took her last breath.  Not that I enjoyed watching her pass, but just to be there with someone you love and have that last opportunity to whisper "I love you", just one more time before they slip away into eternity is a blessing.  I missed that with my mom, and actually it was Pauline who was there in that room with me the night my dad passed away as the nurses made us leave the room when he slipped away.  We never really understood why they wouldn't just let us be there with him in that last second, but Pauline always believed we were there when he took his last breath. She might have been right.

Anyway....so now life must go forward.....and I had gained about 7 lbs. during the time she was in the hospital, and so far I have managed to shed two of them.  I have reflected a lot over the past three weeks about the things that took place with me in regard to my body during the couple of months she was in the hospital.  I realized that I had pretty much managed to drink a "real" soft drink (not diet) at least 5-6 times per week while she was in there, find snacks in the machine because I wasn't going to be home early enough to fix dinner, and okay....yes, I am going to come clean and admit this.....I stopped routinely, about 5-7 times per week to pick up an ice cream cone from McDonald's!!! THERE...I SAID IT!!!  Hey.....I was losing my sister, wasn't it okay for me to make myself feel better with ice cream???? I mean everyone knows that ice cream is the "fix all" when your down, right????  Speaking of ice cream, when our family celebrated July 4th on June 30th, I made homemade banana ice cream...yum, yum! Well, I wasn't satisfied to just have one "little" cup of it, I had to have a second "little" cup of it.......and yes.....I got profusely sick!!!  I had to go to the bathroom and throw up, and then I had to stay in the house and lay down for about 45 minutes until I finally started feeling better and could go back out and enjoy the party.......now look at the time I wasted spending with my family for what???? THE LOVE OF ICE CREAM!!!!  Would I do it again? Well, when we went to Tina's on the 4th, and she made chocolate and banana ice cream, Charlie informed me that I would NOT be having ice cream again.  So, I did kind of sneak a little bit of the chocolate....actually Tina gave it to me; and then about an hour later I sneaked (without anyone knowing) a little bit of the banana!  Well hey, I had to compare to see if Tina could make banana ice cream as well as I can, right???  She can :).

Anyway, my point is that there will ALWAYS be an excuse to treat myself, so I really have to decide for myself if it's worth the possibility of  missing a portion of my life, spending time with the people I love, being sick. I must admit...there are times when it really is worth it to me though...I'm just being honest!  That being said however, most of the time the answer would be "no, it's not".  Anyway, my goal this week has been to be more accountable and get myself back on track with counting my protein and calories, and it has paid off and thus, I've lost the two pounds.  I am still (NOW) 25 lbs. from my ultimate goal weight.....and while I am not convinced I will ever make it there, I am still not ready to give up on the dream of it.....so WE WILL SEE!!!  I will try to be more vigilant in posting my blog and hopefully that will help me to stay focused, which was the purpose of my blog to begin with. 

Here is a view of my thinning face.

Wow! I have really fallen on my blog.  Pauline is still in the hospital and is not doing well at all. In fact she has decided she won't have any further medical treatment and is now waiting for a bed in the Hospice Unit.  I think the whole family is struggling with that decision, however we do understand that she is exhausted and the doctor's have told her there really isn't anything else they can do that would change her outcome.  It is breaking my heart to know that I have to let her go.  My parents lost their second child when she was two years old, but none of us except for Patsy even knew her, so we didn't experience her loss. Pauline will be the first loss of a sibling for us, and I can tell you...it is very difficult! One of my biggest fears in life has always been that my older siblings will all pass before me and I will be left alone.  She is just the beginning of that possibility becoming a reality. We have been extremely blessed that we have gone this many years without a loss like this or of any kind really except for our parents.  

That being said, this is a real test of my ability to stay in control of my eating habits while under an unsurmountable amount of stress.  I haven't gained any weight and am holding my own, but I will say that I have fallen to having an occasional candy bar while at the hospital sitting around waiting.....boredom and stress together.....not a good combination.  I have also been drinking an awful lot of soft drinks.  I have tried over the past few days to pull it together and I think I have done fair.  One thing people have been telling me recently is how thin my face has become, and I have to say it has.....I haven't lost anymore weight, so not sure exactly why my face has thinned.  Only explanation I have come up with is, maybe it's because I have been chewing a lot of gum???? 

I will try to do better at posting!  Hopefully I will get through this hump here and get the last 20 lbs. off someday!!!

I haven't posted in over a month because Pauline has been sick and in the hospital, and I have just been too tired to take the time to post.  I have learned some things about myself over the past month though relative to my desire to eat during a crisis.  My nieces and I were talking about how while we've been going to the hospital so much, we have found it so easy to swing by McDonalds and get food, or in my particular case....and ice cream cone!  The soft serve cone at McDonalds is the perfect size for me and it doesn't cause me any problems with dumping, and probably once a week would not be so bad.  However, during the days we were going up there everyday, I found myself swinging through that drive-thru "every day" to pick up an ice cream cone....not good!  I find that the more I allow myself to splurge like that the more I "want" to splurge.  Definitely something to keep watch on and to be careful about.  I have not lost any weight in so long now, I would have to go back through my blog to find out when I did have a lost last; but I still have at least 19 lbs to lose before I want to level off.  Seems I may have already leveled off, but I do think it's most likely due to my own choice if I have.

Two Year Surgiversary!

Yes, I can hardly believe it has been two years today that I had my weight loss surgery. Two years out, I am very satisfied with my results and still very thankful to God for the opportunity to change my life. I still have about 19 lbs. to lose, and admit that there are times when I wonder if I will ever reach that goal, but I don't intend to give up just yet. Two years later I have learned so much about myself, and reading through this blog I see the changes and the challenges that still remain.

I believe my biggest challenge in finishing my goal has remained my desire to "emotional eat". My surgery did not fix my desire to eat when I'm happy, sad, depressed or bored. I have endured some significant challenges in the past year that have most likely helped to deter my success in reaching my goal. I also have to face the fact and admit that I still love to eat sweets, and unfortunately for me I have continued to indulge more often than I should.....but that is the biggest reason that I should NEVER have even allowed myself to have anything sweet to start with because the more I eat it, the more I want it. So in reflection, I can see why I haven't reached my goal yet. My biggest fear today still remains the "fear of gaining the weight back". I know too many people who have had this surgery that have gained it back, so...keeping that in mind I realize I am never out of the woods so to speak. It will have to be a lifetime committment to myself for me to continue in the success.

I am also reminded today of the things I am able to do that two years ago today I could not do. Most importantly....I can walk from my car to my office without being completely out of breath! In fact....in the afternoons, I am the first person back to my car because I walk so fast! I can cross my legs, bend over to pick things up off the ground, and get in the floor to sit without having to worry about how I am going to get up. In fact in the past couple of weeks I've been painting two rooms in my house, and can get down to paint the trim without problems. I can now ride a roller coaster, zip line, fit through tighter spaces.....the list could go on! I am very excited to say that I do not have asthma anymore or high blood pressure, and I do not take any medication for either!

As I celebrate today, I am reminded of my sweet mother who didn't have the opportunity in her lifetime to have this surgery. She has always been, and remains my inspiration, and I have no doubt that she would be my loudest cheerleader! Here's to you Mom....I have lost 136 lbs., and thank you Jesus for this wonderful opportunity!

April 4th, 2012

WOW!!! I didn't realize it had been over a month since I last posted. I have been a little down over the past month, it just seemed like nothing was going right and I just couldn't get myself motivated to post. Finally a couple of weeks ago, I prayed and told God that I just couldn't bear anymore and asked for some hope......having lean on His promise that he will not put more on us than we can bear, I was beginning to question. Believe it or not though, that very day Keith finally got a call after being off work for a back injury for 9 months that Toyota had a job for him and he started back on April 2nd. Also, on that very day Michael got a job and started on March 26th. So, yes I can testify that God really does not give us more than we can bear, God is good! Not only that.....that week I had also prayed for God to help me find some paint cheap because I wanted to paint my bedroom while I was on vacation last week, and never in a million years dreamed I would find it that cheap....but....I went into Sears that week and lo and behold, they had SIX gallons of paint marked down to $2.97 a gallon!!! YESSSS!!!! So, on my vacation I did get my bedroom painted and I love it! I have enough paint to paint another room in the house too....so I went from feeling very hopeless to feeling incredibly blessed in just a matter of days, thank you Jesus for showing up! Michael loves his job, and Keith started his job a couple of days ago and he LOVES it!!! What a blessing!

With all this going on I have to admit that I have struggled with emotional eating. I haven't gained any weight, in fact I have actually lost a pound and am now down 136 lbs, and have 19 to go til I reach my goal. I have really seen in the past month how the surgery did not fix my head.....I still want to eat when I am down, when I am happy, when I am sad, and pretty much just all the time....food is my comfort, my reward, and that ever so true friend that's always there for me when I just can't seem to get it together. I have discovered recently though that I seem to be having more problems with dumping syndrome. It seems that for the longest time I wasn't really bothered by it, but for some reason in the past few weeks it has started up again, and it's been pretty bad at times. HMMMM.....do you think my body is trying to tell me something??? DUH!

135 LBS. GONE, LAYNE BRYANT PANTS, AND UK T-SHIRT

Well, I have now officially lost 135 lbs., with 20 more to reach the doctor's weight goal for me and 30 to reach the goal I have set for myself.....we'll see! Today I am wearing the pants that I referred to earlier in February that Lynn had gotten for me at Layne Bryant a year ago. My goal was to be able to wear them by the end of February, and I made it! They're still a little snugger than I like, but they don't hurt to sit or eat in them;....you know what I mean!!! I'm still walking at least Mon-Fri for about 45 minutes per day. I'm hanging in there! Oh! one more exciting thing....I have NEVER owned a UK t-shirt, but Michael decided I needed one, so he bought me a really cute pink one yesterday in a size L, and it fit! I probably won't put it in the dryer, but that's okay!

February 24th, 2012

Well, I know it's been two weeks since I posted, but to be honest with you....I haven't really been doing all that great! I have been so sidetracked since mine and Brock's birthday's and just like I did through the holidays....I have gotten off track and I am struggling to get back on the wagon. I've got one leg up on the side, but the wagon is driving faster than I can pull the rest of me up there! I even said to someone this week that I don't know if I will EVER reach my goal weight........DO WHAT????? What am I thinking? Am I really ready to accept where I am and give up completely on my end goal??? Did I really come this far to give up now??? Some days I think so! Just like before surgery when life throws me a curve ball, I tend to turn to that good ole' southern comfort...food! I don't know if we ever really conquer the head thing. In talking to others who have had weight loss surgery, I find that most of them NEVER allow themselves to have sweets and carbs at all. Am I really that different??? I still LOVE food, and the thought of never having something sweet or bread again....well, let's just say I'm not sure it's realistic for me. However, I do know that moderation is definitely key.....and yes, although it's not usually really bad anymore, I do still dump when I have too much sugar. Another thing I notice more and more is that while there are some days when I can only eat small amounts of food, there are other days that I feel like I can (and am) eating almost as much as I did prior to surgery. I still struggle with knowing when to give up......i.e....Michael wanted omelets tonight, so we fixed omelets, well I was full at half, but I sat and ate slowly till I finished it.....why didn't I stop at half??? I really don't know.....surely it's not that old thing my mother used to say about the kids in China???? IS IT??? I won't say that it really has to do with the kids in China, but I think it does have to do with the fact that as kids we're told we have to finish everything on our plates, so when we grow up we still think we have to finish "everything" on our plates. Okay, so here's a concept.....why don't we put "less" on our plates????? HMMMM.....

HOLIDAY WEIGHT IS GONE...WOO HOO!!!

I just couldn't wait a week to post this....but I have lost ALL of the five pounds I gained during the holidays plus one!!! YESSSSSS!!!!!!!! Of other notable mention, is that going through my closet last night looking for a shirt to wear under my sweater today, I pulled out a blouse that I wore last summer with a t-shirt under it because it was too tight to button and wear alone. I put the shirt on to check it out and lo and behold....IT BUTTONED!!!! WOO HOO!!!! It is a good day!!!

I can hear Mama shouting from heaven for me today! Michael used to say when he was little that Granny is baking chocolate cakes in heaven now.....I can't wait to get there and eat one of those cakes that doesn't have the calories!

Almost February!

I can hardly believe that January is gone!!! I have still only lost 4 of the 5 lbs I gained during the holidays, but that's okay....4 lbs in a month isn't too bad. Prior to surgery I would have been thrilled to have lost all but 1 lb of my holiday weight by the end of January. The big challenge for February will be mine and Brock's birthdays are this month, and of course it's Valentine's Day. We tend to eat a lot over our birthday weekend. I suppose we should be thankful that we have both birthday's and Valentine's Day all together, so we can get it done in a few days and have the rest of the month to recover.

I have noticed that my clothes are feeling better because I have been walking at work, so that's a good thing. I do have this one pair of pants that Lynn picked up for me last year at Lane Bryant that are a size 14, that are still just a smidgin' too tight. My goal for February is to get into those pants by the end of the month.....hmmm......we'll see!

Finally Starting to Get It Together!

I believe I am finally starting to get it together....yesss! I did some real soul searching this week and did some more research in an effort to help me get it together, and I think I may finally have it! I weighed this morning and I have now lost 4 of the 5 lbs. I gained over the holidays. I have been walking consistently for three weeks now, and after doing some research I have discovered (what I really already knew) that I have been sabotaging my weight loss by having too many calories still. I decided to look at the gastric bypass information again and realized that I have indeed been grazing.....NOT GOOD! Grazing is where you eat a little at a time, but you pretty much eat all day long....and yes....that's what I've been doing. I've also been careless about eating carbs, and of course sugar since the holidays. One example of my carelessness is...when we go to a movie I get a small popcorn = carbs and a "large" Icee = sugar! Yes....it's true! This is just a sample of some of the things I've been doing which don't seem too bad at the time, but when I realized just how often this exact type of thing happens...that's when I realized...it's my fault I'm not reaching my goal....DUH!!!

So, last night when we went to the movies I made the decision before I went that even though I had a "$2.00 off coupon" for popcorn that I was not going to eat popcorn.....those coupons really mess with my head. I tend to feel like if I have a coupon to save money I "MUST" take advantage of it, right???? Well, amazingly enough I went last night and didn't use my $2.00 coupon, had unsweetened tea left from my dinner which I took in with me, and guess what??? I came home with about $10.00 more than if I had used my $2.00 coupon and gotten an Icee!!! How cool is that??? Amazing how that happens, and you know what else??? I stayed within my calorie range for the day.....even more amazing!!! Thus I wake up this morning, weigh and I have "lost weight".....WOW!!!

So...my goal for this next week is to stop grazing and stay within my 1200 calorie per day range, cut the sugar and carbs....hmmm...we'll see what happens!

Still Struggling.....But It's Okay

Yes, it's two weeks since the holiday's ended, but I am still struggling to get back on track. I did manage to get one more pound off this week, so I just have three of my five pounds I gained over the holidays to lose now. I have walked everyday this week and I'm slowly, but surely getting closer to getting back on track. Proof yet again that they did not fix my head!

I remember talking to people who had been through gastric bypass prior to my surgery and they told me they had no desire for chocolate or sugar. So when I had my surgery I was sure that I would lose my desire for all the foods (mostly sweets) I love and crave. It did in the early days; I couldn't stand the thought of sugar, what I didn't realize, and what nobody told me was that eventually those things would come back to haunt me.

The winter is definitely proving to be difficult for me again as well. I am so bored sitting at the house when I come home from work and there is absolutely nothing on TV these days. So I sit there in the evenings and want to eat. With all the energy I have you would think I would get some much needed work on the house done, but instead I sit at my computer and play games most of the night trying to keep food off my mind. Definitely looking forward to Spring!

Me in My Before Pants.....Size 26!!!

Difficulty Starting Over

Well, here it is Friday, January 6th and I am definitely realizing the effects of "letting go" through the holidays. Getting back on the right track has proven to be more difficult than I anticipated. Journaling has gone well, but I am still facing those daily demons of "unexpected occurrences". Example: Yesterday Michael and Keith decided to bring me lunch.....well, I had already had my day planned out, so when they brought me lunch it completely messed me up. Instead of 160 calorie lunch of PB2 and sugar free jelly, I had Zaxby's chicken, a few fries and bread....total calories of 460; 300 more than I had planned. NOW....mind you IF I had just had two pieces of chicken and left it at that, I might have been okay with that at a total of 173 calories. Also, keeping in mind that I ate three chicken strips, only ate a few fries and didn't eat all the bread, but the increase of calories for that extra piece of chicken, few fries and 1/2 bread was detrimental in messing up my entire day of caloric intake. Then last night instead of eating light like I had planned, we unexpectedly went out and ended up eating fast food of Wendy's, and again....I ate too much food.....blew me off the charts w/ my goal of 1200 calories.

So, the moral of my story is......that slippery slope is very dangerous and once I go down it, it is very difficult to for me to get back on track....HOWEVER, I refuse to give up and today is a completely new day and I still have 37 more pounds to lose......so today I pledge to stay on track no matter what comes up.

The good thing about this week; my foot is better and I have been walking again this week. So...I guess the week hasn't been a total loss, plus I have lost 1 of the 5 lbs I gained through the holidays. I will be doing some updated pictures over the next week and am even planning on pulling out the clothes I had on in my very first picture and taking a picture with them on....hmmmm!

Happy New Year!!!

Happy New Year Everyone!!! Here it is January 2, 2012 and I find that I have gained five pounds over the holidays, have eaten quite freely this holiday season, and now I am paying for it. Not sure exactly why, but twice in the past week I've gotten food stuck in my stomach, and had to throw up before I could get any relief. Not a good sign!!! I haven't thrown up in quite a long time. Michael asked me today if I thought my stomach was trying to tell me something.......smarty pants!!! Needless to say I guess I am going to have to really pay close attention to what my stomach is telling me and kick myself back into gear here.

The holidays are finally over and although I'm dreading the long winter and several months now before I get another vacation, I am glad to be getting back into a regular routine and start getting myself back on track in more ways than one. We got Dianne moved back home a few weeks ago and she seems to be doing fine,and Michael moved back home the day after Dianne moved out. Michael is job hunting and has decided to go back to school in August to get his degree in psychology and get a Ph.D. Right now he is considering very strongly a school in New Mexico. Brock is still happy in his job at Amazon and we are praying very hard that Toyota will find placement for Keith with his restrictions within the next couple of weeks. This week they will finally open up the freeze they've had on transfers, so we are hopeful that something will break for him soon. Hopefully he and Michael will be working again soon, and our 2012 will get going in the right direction. It is much easier for me to stay focused on eating right when everyone around me is doing well. Michael says I will be his first psychological case......WOW!!! Probably a very difficult case to start out with!!!

Sooooo......goodbye to the chocolate, sugar and all those other foods that haunted me through these holidays, and hello to healthy eats, journalling and exercise!!! Tomorrow I will try walking with my foot and see how things go, hopefully well!!!